


i need to hear you say it's all you want

by orphan_account



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, I just couldn't help myself, M/M, Soulmate AU, i'm still in season two, some slight fluff, sorry if i butcher some of the scenes, technically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-24 09:23:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16172234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: soulmate au where you’re born with dual colored hair, and it turns into one solid color (usually the more noticeable one) once you figure out who your soulmate is, it can happen when you meet them, or you could know the person for years and then it happenskeith never wanted a soulmate, because shiro didn't have one





	i need to hear you say it's all you want

**Author's Note:**

> dedicated to my darling dara, who is my soulmate <3

keith doesn’t notice it until maybe three months after he’d been kicked out of the garrison.

the bathroom in the cabin doesn’t have a mirror, and it’s not like keith really cares about his appearance anyway.

he’d been out getting some basic necessities that he really couldn’t do without for much longer and he’d stopped short as soon as he saw his reflection.

the store he was in sold everything for a cheap price, and usually the things were bad quality, but it was something at least.

there was an entire wall dedicated to mirrors of different sizes and shapes.

keith had barely glanced at it the last time he was here, but this time he couldn’t look away.

his hair, it had changed.

it wasn’t that noticeable, but then again, keith’s hair had never been that noticeable.

shiro had been the only one to really notice.

sitting next to keith underneath the glare of the sunlight. he’d reached out and caught the hair brushing keith’s neck between two fingers. _“it looks kind of purple,”_ he said thoughtfully.

keith had looked at him from beneath his fringe, eyes falling from the forelock of pure white hair to his mouth. keith looked away again.

 _“it is,”_ he’d responded, and shiro had let the hair go and hadn’t asked anymore questions.

in the harsh glare of the lights in the store, keith noticed.

all of his hair was giving off a dark purple sheen. it was still dark enough that it could pass for black, but in the light it was going to shine purple.

keith can’t afford to leave the necessities behind so he buys what he came for and goes back home as fast as he can.

he waits until he’s within the safety of his home to start freaking out.

this meant that he’d figured out who his soulmate was, but who was it?

the only person that he even gave a passing thought to (passing because it was too painful otherwise) was shiro, and shiro couldn’t possibly…

no, shiro wasn’t.

if he was, keith would’ve known.

shiro was important to him, but there was no way…

keith let out a breath and closed his eyes.

shiro was his friend, and more importantly, shiro was _dead_. if it was shiro, keith’s hair would be white.

keith exhaled. it was probably just a trick of the light, keith thought before he turned and went to put away his shopping.

he can’t quite squish the kernel of hope that took a hold of him, however. what if the hair meant that shiro was still alive?

 

*

 

keith wakes up and the bed is empty.

he looks at it with a dead expression, before he realizes that the clothes he’d set on the foot of the bed last night were missing.

keith uncurls himself from the chair he’s been perched on all night and stretches his arms above his head, cracking his spine and neck.

he yawns as he walks through the cabin, paying little attention to the three cadets that have taken over the couch and kitchen chairs and table.

he walks through the door and there is shiro.

keith feels as though the breath has been punched out of him.

shiro is _alive_.

he’s alive and standing right in front of keith.

alive and obviously has gone through something horrible and life changing, but still, alive.

keith clenches his fingers tightly into fists.

he wants to run up to shiro and hold him tightly, and breath in his scent to see if it’s changed at all from what keith remembers. he wants to press his hands on shiro’s face, and trace his fingers over the scar across the bridge of his nose, and look him in the eyes and tell him how much he missed him. how he’d grieved for him, and had demanded that the stars give him back the night that he’s sure now, his hair changed color.

but the stars had stayed silent, giving him nothing but whispers. until last night.

keith walks up behind shiro, trying to make as much noise as possible.

he can see the way that shiro’s shoulders tense, and only go lax as soon as keith’s hand touches him.

“it’s good to have you back,” keith says instead of the thousand of other things he wants to say.

“it’s good to be back,” shiro says sounding relieved.

he turns to keith mouth open and freezes.

keith doesn’t realize what shiro is looking at until shiro is reaching out and trapping a windblown chunk of hair between his fingers and observing it in the light coming from the sunrise.

keith feels his cheeks growing hot and he wants to hide his face, so he doesn’t, staring straight into shiro’s eyes when he turns his face to look down at keith.

he smiles at him, and the smile makes keith’s heart squeeze painfully in his chest.

“so, who’s the lucky person?” he asks sounding like he’s _happy for keith_ , of all things.

keith opens his mouth and closes it again.

he doesn’t really know what to say.

he can’t tell shiro that he thinks _shiro_ is his soulmate.

especially not with the fact that he could never be shiro’s soulmate, not with that patch of white hair proclaiming to all that his soulmate had died before they could meet.

so he doesn’t say anything, instead shrugs and looks away.

shiro catches on to the fact that he doesn’t want to talk about it, and changes the subject.

 

*

 

keith waits until it’s late at night, and there is no one else awake, but shiro sitting down right beside him on the observation deck.

his thigh is pressed up right next to keith’s hip. keith’s legs are gathered to his chest.

he lies his head on his knees and turns to look at shiro.

shiro is staring out at the stars passing them by. he looks so at peace even though they’re in the middle of a war.

“maybe it’s my galra side,” keith says breaking the silence and making shiro look at him.

“what is?” shiro encourages him gently, turning his body towards him.

“the hair,” keith says, looking down to the barely there space between them.

“it’s purple, and almost all the galra we’ve seen have had purple skin and fur. maybe the color is a galra thing, not a soulmate thing. maybe i don’t have a soulmate.”

he feels shiro’s fingers in his hair and leans into the movement automatically.

“it could be a galra thing,” shiro concedes sounding thoughtful and nothing else, which makes keith’s heart feel as though it’s too big for his chest.

he tugs against the strands and keith moves his gaze from the ground back to shiro.

shiro smiles at him. the same smile from when he first noticed the purple strands.

“but i’m pretty sure you’ve got a soulmate somewhere out there waiting for you.”

keith frowns and eyes the white hair on shiro’s head before he looks back into shiro’s eyes. “how are you so sure?”

“because the universe isn’t mean enough to take that away from you too.”

he looks so earnest and kind that keith can’t help but smile back, even if there is a sharp pain in his chest.

“thanks shiro,” he says softly, and it sounds breathless.

shiro ruffles his hair softly, fingers trailing down the side of his face as his hand falls away.

keith watches as he leans back on his hands and returns his gaze back to the stars.

keith watches him for a beat before turning to look at the stars too.

 

*

 

there is an ache in keith’s chest that refuses to go away.

the only times that it seems to be soothed are when keith is sitting inside of the black lion. he feels her presence in his head and it reminds him so much of shiro that he cries the first time.

“we’re going to get him back,” he promises her.

she roars into his head, and keith knows that it’s in agreement.

 

*

 

they get him back, and still keith’s chest aches.

 

*

 

there is a knock on his door just when keith gets out of the shower.

keith is only wearing a towel, holding another towel to dry his hair.

well, it’s not like his team hasn’t seen him in worse states of undress.

he opens the door, and there is shiro, holding one hand behind his back, the other raised to knock again.

“k-keith,” shiro says, stuttering for some reason.

his eyes drag down keith’s body in a way that makes keith feel _hot_ and weird, but not bad weird.

for some reason, shiro’s gaze snaps to a spot somewhere above keith’s head and he stands ramrod straight.

“sorry,” shiro says, voice sounding hoarse before he clears his throat twice. “i didn’t mean to interrupt your shower.”

“you didn’t,” keith says draping the second towel across his shoulders. “i just finished. is there something that you want?”

shiro’s eyes snap back to his face, and he licks his bottom lip.

“hair, please” comes out of his mouth forcibly, and his cheeks flame red before he’s holding out his other hand where he’s got a pair of scissors.

keith raises an eyebrow. “you want me to help you with your hair?”

shiro nods his head. he clears his throat again. “i’m sure that i can handle it, but the back might look like i just hacked it all off with a pair of shears.”

keith laughs. “sure, i’ll help.”

shiro smiles at him, and it’s different than his usual smiles at keith.

“come in,” he says stepping aside and letting shiro into his room.

“let me just get dressed,” keith says walking towards the closet. “i’ll meet you in the bathroom.”

keith gets dressed as fast as he can. he’s pulling his shirt on as he walks towards the bathroom.

he stops at the doorway and just stares as shiro haphazardly cuts chunks of hair off.

he steps forward after a brief pause. “here, let me…”

he wraps his fingers around the wrist of the hand holding the scissors to keep him still and then takes the scissors away from him.

shiro gives them up easily.

he sits down backwards on the toilet seat and keith pauses again before he moves, opening the cabinet and pulling out the electric razor.

“where did you get that?” shiro asked raising an eyebrow.

keith shrugged. “it was around. hold still.”

keith got to work quickly, concentrating on the task, turning shiro’s head this way and that way to make sure he got the sides as close to the scalp as possible.

he picked up the scissors afterwards and cut the top of shiro’s hair back to how it was before he’d left.

shiro smiles at keith’s reflection afterwards.

“thanks,” he says sincerely.

keith nods. and he crosses his arms across his chest and looks at the white hair on shiro’s head.

he looks back down to shiro’s mouth briefly and then away.

“ _oh_ ,” shiro breaths and turns in the small space to look at keith.

keith looks up at him, brow furrowed.

“are you okay?” keith asks going for sincere as well. “you know, you can always talk to me about anything.”

shiro smiles at him, and keith’s heart thuds hard in his chest. the sensation isn’t all that pleasant. keith smiles back but rubs his fingers against his chest briefly.

“thanks again,” shiro says. he looks around then and notices the hair all over the floor. “i’ll go get something to help clean this up.”

keith shakes his head, “don’t bother. i’ll take care of it. you should rest.”

shiro looks at keith as though he knows that keith is trying to get rid of him, like if he wasn’t about to leave and not come back.

shiro leaves the room without another word.

 

*

 

the ache in keith’s chest doesn’t go away. if anything it starts getting worse. and only two things seem to help. being inside of black’s cockpit, and being as far away from shiro as he possibly can.

keith doesn’t know when it changed, but something is different.

something didn’t feel right. didn’t seem to click.

had they both changed so much in the time that they were apart that they could no longer _be_ like they used to.

when keith leaves he does it mostly because he needs to be where he’s most useful, but there is a small part that does it to spend some time away.

he needs to think.

he’s warmed by the promise that he’ll always have a place among them, but it feels a little lackluster.

keith wished that he could tell shiro goodbye in private, just the two of them, because there were some things that should have been said.

but he just lets go of shiro and then turns to go.

he doesn’t make it very far down the hall before there is someone calling after him.

shiro runs up to him, and once he’s within arm’s length he reaches towards keith, hands on his shoulders.

“hey, one more thing,” shiro says, and then as easy as breathing, like they did it all the time, shiro leans in and kisses him.

keith freezes.

shiro pulls away smiling brightly. “i meant what i said, but also, come back sometimes because, i’m going to miss you.”

he’s speaking so earnestly, and his eyes are wide and boring into keith’s.

keith’s mouth feels hot.

“i promise,” keith says breathlessly mouth quirking up into a smile. “you can’t get rid of me that easily.”

shiro just smiles and pulls away, walking backwards until he turns around and walks into the room where the others are waiting.

keith presses his fingers to his mouth, and then turns around rapidly.

he has to get out of here.

 

*

 

his sparing partner asks the question when they're taking a break to hydrate, “you know you have a patch of white hair, right here. is it symbolic on earth?”

keith had his hair tied up since it had gotten too long and too into his face when he was fighting.

keith freezes and then moves before the other can say anything else.

he’s hailing the castle before he knows it.

they patch him through immediately.

“keith is everything okay?” shiro’s worried voice comes through the speakers before the image flickers showing his worried face.

keith feels the relief spread throughout him. shiro is okay.

“everything is fine,” keith says. “just wanted to see how you guys were doing.”

shiro smiles widely at that and starts speaking, telling him ridiculous but completely believable stories.

keith falls asleep listening to the sound of his voice.

 

*

 

he asks, “is the hair something you just noticed, or what?”

they gives him a serious look, “it’s been there for as long as i’ve seen you wearing your hair up.

keith’s gut clenches, but he tries not to think too hard about it, he’s got a mission that he should be concentrating on.

 

*

 

by the time that keith understands that shiro isn’t _his_ shiro, he feels like an idiot. he should’ve noticed earlier.

but by then it doesn’t matter.

he feels the realization wash over him and comes to terms with the fact that he’s already decided to do anything he can to save him, because he loves him because he loves _his_ shiro.

 

*

 

“you found me,” shiro says and his eyes bore into keith’s, and keith has to bite down on his lip to not say something completely inappropriate in front of everyone else.

“ah, we’re glad you’re back, shiro.” he says and lets the relief bleed into his voice.

of course, this is when keith becomes distracted by the fact that shiro’s hair turns completely white before he sighs, closes his eyes, and passes out.

 

*

 

keith puts black on autopilot and looks back to where his mom is sleeping on the bunk and shiro is leaning against the wall, reading along with one of the books he’d probably statshed on black _before_.

keith stands and stretches.

he walks over to shiro and sits down beside him, sliding down the wall until he can feel shiro’s thigh pressed alongside his.

“hey,” he says when shiro closes his book, holding his place with his finger and turns towards him.

shiro smiles at him.

keith’s eyes go to his hair and then to his mouth and then away and out the window where the stars were passing by, slowly.

shiro misinterprets his gaze.

“i think it’s a delayed reaction,” he says and keith can see him lifting his hand up to his head out of the corner of his eye. “maybe the stress of coming back turned it completely white.”

keith looks back at him to see he’s wearing a sheepish smile and looking down at the book now open and face down on his lap.

“you know, for a long time, i always hoped that my soulmate would end up being an animal i rescued, or maybe the stars, but no, this,” he waves his hand around his head, encompassing the white strands of hair, “just means that i don’t have a soulmate anymore.”

“you sound, oddly, okay with it,” keith muses slowly.

shiro laughs a little, “yeah, you get a lot of time to think when you’re dead and stuck in the astral plane, and i decided that it didn’t matter.”

“right,” keith says and then turns and crosses his legs underneath himself so that he’s facing shiro completely.

shiro turns his body towards him but stays leaning against the wall.

“you died,” keith says, and the words feel like ashes in his mouth. “you died,” he repeats again and looks into shiro’s eyes. “and my hair started turning white.”

shiro’s brow furrows in confusion.

keith pulls his hair up and turns his head to the side.

he closes his eyes when he feels shiro move.

he can feel his hand touching against the back of his neck, threading the strands between his fingers.

“it’s lilac,” shiro says softly.

keith drops his hair and turns back to shiro in confusion.

“it’s not white,” he says putting his hand down on the book on his lap. “it’s lilac. almost as though the white mixed with the darker purple of your hair.”

his brow is furrowed as he continues speaking sounding thoughtful. “i’ve never heard of that happening before. usually a white patch means that your soulmate had a near death experience, but maybe this means that your soulmate is galra.”

he looks back to keith and smiles that same smile he always does whenever they’re discussing keith’s soulmate.

keith feels like shaking him.

“but it was white,  even my mom said so.”

“well there you go,” shiro says sounding amused. “galra can’t really differentiate between colors, maybe she just thought that it was white.”

keith opens his mouth, then closes it again, because dammit, shiro does have a point.

keith sighs and moves leaning back against the wall.

shiro copies him and keeps quiet.

keith closes his eyes and says, “do you remember anything, from, from _before_?”

he can feel shiro staring at him but he doesn’t open his eyes.

“you mean from the c-clone?”

keith nods his head firmly once, feeling jittery.

“not a lot,” shiro admits in a quiet voice. “bits and pieces, here and there. but nothing that screams he wasn’t-me.”

he pauses weirdly between the last two words, and keith feels his chest ache.

“we should’ve known,” keith admits in an equally quiet voice. “or at least i should’ve realized…”

“keith,” shiro says softly, and he waits until keith opens his eyes and turns to look at him before he continues.

“it’s not your fault. the whole point was that he fit in with you guys. and from what i remember, he didn’t do a bad job being me.”

keith clears his throat looking away from shiro and then standing to his feet.

“i should go back and…”

“yeah,” shiro says immediately and keith hears the rustling of pages. “you go right ahead. i’m here if you need to talk about anything, though, okay?”

keith nods his head jerkily and goes back to his seat.

this was going to be a really long trip.

 

*

 

this time shiro knocks on his door right when keith finishes his workout and was going to take a shower.

he opens the door wiping the sweat of his brow on the bottom of his t-shirt.

“hey,” he says when he sees shiro, straightening and letting his shirt go.

shiro’s eyes are unfocused, staring somewhere in the vicinity of keith’s stomach.

he suddenly tears his eyes away and looks up over keith’s shoulder.

“so-sorry,” he stutters. “i’ve been getting more and more flashes lately.”

keith didn’t have to ask of what. he also didn’t have to ask what shiro remembered.

especially when he looks away, cheeks red and stutters through asking him to help trim his hair.

keith steps aside and opens the door wider, a wordless offer to come inside.

“i was going to take a shower,” he says motioning shiro towards the small table in the equally small kitchenette. “but i can take care of you first.”

shiro trips over, something, and nearly faceplants on the table.

keith gives him an askance look, but shiro doesn’t look back at him.

keith walks to the bathroom and finds the electric shaver kit he’d bought even though he never uses it.

“not too short, okay,” shiro says finally managing to look keith in the eye.

keith just nods his head and changes the blade and the setting before getting to work.

it was easy and familiar in a way that things weren’t anymore.

keith trimmed the sides just a bit shorter than the hair at the top. that he left almost the same length that it was.

he was passing the machine over the back of his neck when he noticed the difference in color.

it was light enough that you could convince yourself your eyes were deceiving you. keith turned the shaver off and touched his fingers to that spot to make sure what he was seeing, and shiro inhaled sharply.

he stills for a long moment, but before keith can ask about _any_ of it, shiro is getting up and leaving.

he makes an excuse that keith doesn’t really hear and is gone before keith even manages to get a word in.

“see you at dinner,” he says running out of keith’s room.

keith brushes his fingers together, and then presses a hand over his chest.

it’s almost too good to be true.

but he’s sure that that patch of lilac hair would match the one that keith had.

 

*

 

keith gives shiro until he doesn’t show up for dinner.

he walks down the halls a man on a mission, someone tries to talk to him, but keith doesn’t have time for anything else right now.

he makes it to shiro’s room and doesn’t even bother knocking before he’s pressing his hand over the palm reader. the door opens automatically to shiro sitting in his own little table eating dinner, alone.

he stands up as keith storms in, eyes wide.

“keith,” he says voice sounding strained. “what are you doing here?”

“you didn’t show up at dinner,” keith says honestly. “i was worried. what’s going on? why are you acting so weird?”

keith looks at him expectantly.

shiro swallows hard and his gaze drops deliberately to keith’s mouth, and keith gets _it_.

“oh,” he says and takes a step back towards the door. “maybe i should just go-”

“who is your soulmate?” shiro blurts out, and then gasps in horror and slaps his hand over his mouth.

keith turns to look at him with wide eyes.

“sorry,” shiro says. “i just mean, we’ve been back home long enough. haven’t you figured it out yet?”

“why? why does it matter if we’re back on earth? don’t you get it?” keith snaps taking a step closer and looking at shiro intensely for a long moment.

“it’s not like anything is going to come of it. i’m not an idiot okay? i don’t know exactly why you- _he-you,_ urgh, i don’t know why it happened, _okay_ ? but i _never_ expected anything from you. so just please, don’t make this into a thing.”

shiro blinks at him like he can’t understand what keith is saying.

“are you saying what i think you’re saying?” shiro asks slowly as though he needs keith to be completely honest with him.

keith sighs and just looks at him a little desperately before he gulps and looks away.

“it’s you shiro. it’s always been you.”

shiro makes a noise like keith stabbed him and when keith turns to face him, shiro is already there, standing so close, and moving even closer, reaching out to cradle his face and pull him even closer.

keith feels a telltale tingle on his scalp that is very familiar.

he looks up into shiro’s eyes, and shiro hesitates right on the precipice so keith takes the plunge for them both.

he tilts his chin forward and presses their mouths together lightly, a whisper of a kiss.

he feels it like an electric charge right to his veins. the tingle on his scalp intensifies, and keith realizes that this, _this_ , is what the first kiss had been missing.

he tilts his head to the side, brushing their noses together as he presses a even harder kiss against shiro’s mouth chasing the feeling.

he inhales sharply when shiro’s fingers thread through his hair and presses their mouths together trapping keith’s bottom lip against his lips.

keith gasps as shiro kisses his bottom lip.

shiro tugs keith’s lip into his mouth, pressing his tongue against it before pushing closer, pressing their mouths harder, and sliding his tongue into keith’s mouth teasingly.

that tears through the remaining of keith’s self control like tissue paper.

keith raises his hands sliding them up shiro’s back, and is rewarded with a shudder and shiro moving closer to keith until he can feel the long line of him pressing in close.

keith slides his hands into shiro’s hair and uses his hold as leverage to drag his body against shiro’s pressing them together even closer, and raising on his feet slightly to even out the height difference.

keith tugs shiro’s head to the side pushes his tongue into shiro’s mouth.

he feels desperate and like his skin is too tight over his bones and muscles.

shiro drapes his arms across keith’s shoulders and slows the kiss down, pressing even closer, until keith is forced to take a step back straight into the wall or risk his knees failing him.

shiro presses in closer, arms pressed to either side of keith’s head as he continues to kiss him, slow and wet.

keith loses himself for a couple of minutes, and only becomes aware again when shiro pulls away from his mouth with a slick sound and a low hum at the back of his throat.

keith’s dazed and it takes him a long time to blink his eyes open.

when he finally does, it’s to see shiro’s face so close to his own, cheeks pink, eyes boring into keith’s looking at him as though keith holds the secrets of the universe in his eyes.

keith can’t take it, so he diverts his gaze and gasps when his eyes take in the rest of shiro’s head.

he slides his fingers through shiro’s hair almost as though he can’t help it.

shiro sighs and leans in to kiss keith again, but the smile that keith has on his face isn’t really helping matters.

shiro pulls back a little making a questioning noise at the back of his throat.

“it’s lilac,” keith answers feeling like his heart squeeze in his chest, but it’s not painful at all.

he slides his fingers through shiro’s hair again.

then shiro’s laughing and it sounds so _relieved_ and _happy_ that keith’s gaze drops back down to his face.

shiro’s hands bury themselves in keith’s hair and he tugs. “yours too.”

keith can’t help it when he pushes forward and presses their mouths together, wanting to taste shiro’s happiness.

shiro kisses him back, but they’re smiling too much for it to actually go anywhere.

“i’ve heard the stories, but i never thought that it was actually something that actually happened,” shiro says in a soft awed voice, fingers still buried in keith’s hair.

he tugs a little and presses his forehead to keith’s.

keith’s hands haven’t stopped running through shiro’s hair.

“you know, white hair also means that your soulmate isn’t human, or at least that’s what the specialist told me when i was little,” shiro continues.

keith didn’t know that, but it makes sense.

“you’re my soulmate,” shiro breathes out.

keith stares into shiro’s eyes and kisses him again.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!


End file.
